Monday, January 21, 2008

How about the children?

So many people ask me: "So how your children taking it?"

My common answer is: "Alhamdulillah, they are taking it well".

You see Ky had been sick for years and during the last one year when the cancer had affected her liver (which means that death could occur in the next few months), we have prepared my children. In fact, Ky's personal doctor cum mentor and happen to be her schoolmate, Dr. Pang, had personally counselled my children at her clinic. She spoke to them beginning with the 2 elder boys and then the 2 younger boy and girl.

Over time, I had personally told my children to be prepared for whatever will happen. They knew that Ky's health was deteriorating. In fact 2 weeks before Ky's passing, I got all my children together and told them what to expect.

"Mak tengah sakit kuat dan mungkin dah tak lama lagi dengan kita. Jadi awaksemua mesti tawakal apa akan jadi. Ayah taknak Emak risau tentang awaksemua. Kalau emak pergi pun, ayah ada kat sini. Apa-apa hal beritahu ayah, ok". I told them.

I also told all my boys to read Yassin and AlQuran besides Ky when she could hardly knows whose who around her. They also say Shahadah or Allah continuously beside their mothers so that Ky could hear it.

In fact, during Ky's last breath, they were beside her. They saw Ky's passing in front of their very own eyes. I believe that they had redha Ky's passing and so have I.

And because I had prepare them earlier over time, Alhamdulillah they can take it for now. The boys seems ok. Only Mimi once awhile would say that she misses her mom. How couldn't she? She was with her mom almost all the time. She bathe and eats with Ky. Sleeps besides Ky. And she do everything with her mom. Now without Ky, I have to take this role. And for now Mimi have accepted the fact that Mom is no more around.

Whenever I or the kids can, we will visit her grave. In fact during the first week, I never fail to go to her grave. I bundled the kids in my car whenever they are around and went together. Ky have mentioned that whenever we go to visit her, she don't want us to read Yassin or Tahlil at her grave. Only sedekah Alfatihah to her, especially from her children. And we did just that.

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