I Still Remember

I received an email from my youngest sister, Ina, written in some kind of poem/story. It was so touching that I think I should share this to all my silent readers. By the way, my family address me as Jemie since I was small. And to give more emotion when you read this, please put this song by Alleycats which is also touching.



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Dear Jemie,

I can feel what you feel now. Be strong.........

I still remember....... that Ky is the one who pushed me to take driving licence 10 years ago. She said " Na, my friend tak de confidence, nampak lembik aje tapi dia boleh pass driving test, you mesti boleh pass". Then I took the test. In JPJ hall was about 70 candidates. I was so nervous. Few hours later I got the result. My results was 50/50 ( full marks). Kalau Ky tak give me confidence I would not sit for the exam.

I still remember .......... after got married it took two years for me to decide to have baby. Ky came and suggested me this "Na, you can go to any family clinic to check pregnancy, don't worry everything will be fine". Then only I started think of having baby, because before this I dont have knowlege in it. When I got first baby, Ky is the one who gave me anything that I need for the baby. From baby court (basket) to anything else.

I still remember ................when I heard she is ill, I called her (to hear from her mouth). She said Ky ada cancer..................and she stopped for a while (I knew she's crying).

I still remember ...... when I knew she was first warded in SGMC due to her illness, I visited her. Her sis, Kak Minah was with her. Ky said that Jemie want to sleep at the hospital to take care of her but she refused and asked Jemie to go back to do something more important. In my heart said when I was in hospital to deliver baby I only want my husband to be around, but not Ky, she such a brave lady.

I still remember ..........she is the only auntie to give Naza card, wishing him well in UPSR.

I still remember .............. she was happy to hear Nazmi and I further our study in University and always asked on our progress whenever she met us.

I still remember .......... a week before she passed away, she sat in the same table with me (the rest went to Kota Bharu) eating ketupat in emak's house. She said she hates to see herself in mirror, like skeleton. We also talk so many things until she realised that she ate so much ( she said I don't eat lately but today I eat alot).... she finished the whole plate. I advised her 'Ky jangan ikutkan selera tapi ingat kesihatan tu.." She then passed me a present. I only sempat bought her a small cake.

I still remember.............. when Kak Chik called me informing that Ky dah meninggal..... I was in the middle of discussion in my office with an important guy. I immediately stopped the discussion capai beg and I informed him that I got to go coz my sister-in-law passed away. Dia terpingga-pingga sebab I ask him to go as I need to lock my office room.

I still remember ................during the kebumi my children (3 of them) want to go nearer to the kubor, to see their aunty Kiky, Nique even went closest kat celah-celah orang, sampai I got to hold his hand kalau tidak dia akan sama-sama turun ke liang. He requested to pour water for his aunty Kiky but because of too many people and the water also finished I just asked him to go back.

I still remember ...... when I went to visit emak and I told her that Kiky has passed away emak said.. "Kiky baik, dia tak ada apa-apa dosa dengan mak........."

I still remember ....... sometimes back, when I watched Ky in TV, when she gave talk, she said she is fortunate to have husband that so caring to his mother. And if the husband care about his mother he cares about his wife too....and she also said that her daughter always play with her wig'

We have so many similarities .......... celebrate birthday together, youngest in family, same wedding anniversary date, very independent but caring and loving.

We always sms wishing each other on our happy day .............. but now ???

Jemie, our family included her in all our bacaan yassin, solat hajat etc ever since we knew she is ill. Eventhough we could not spend time camping in your house due to our commitment with our children (so happen the school just started) but we pray for her in every of our solat. All of us ....................... our family.

Jemie, remember how emak went through her time when abah passed away. With 11 of us still young. She is very strong right?? and she can handle lots of things .................so to you.

Harimau mati meninggalkan belang, manusia mati meninggalkan nama.. Kiky tinggalkan nama yang sangat baik dan semasa hayatnya dia menggunakan setiap kesempatan yang ada dengan amat baik untuk bersama semua orang yang dikenalinya. Dan hasilnya kita nampak semasa saat dia meninggalkan kita ... semua yang dia kenal memberikan hormat yang tinggi padanya..... dengan jumlah kehadiran ramai kenalannya.....................

Until now, I have not deleted her name from my handphone.

Amin ya rabbal Alamin